were we led all that way for

Birth or Death? There was a birth, certainly,

We had evidence and no doubt. I had seen birth and death,

But had thought they were different; this Birth was

Hard and bitter agony for us, like Death, 

T.S. Eliot, The Journey of the Magi

Eliot captures the way in which the journey to the Christ-child changes us. We are not told which of the three is talking, but in that birth, he had seen a death – and he could no longer feel no longer “at ease here, in the old dispensation, / With an alien people clutching their gods.” Neither can we, having journeyed to the Christ child be at ease with the many “false gods” worshipped by this society.

We read, with horror, in Matthew 2: 16-18, of how Herod had all new-born sons massacred after the Magi had not reported back to him. It tears at us – as it should. How horrible, we think. Yet, we live in a society marked by a much greater horror. Herod had a selfish motive for his action – he wanted to kill a rival king. What is our excuse for allowing abortion on demand? The law in the UK does not allow for it, but in practice, it is what we have. Here, unlike in the US, it is not a political issue. We simply accept it.

Yes, even to query it is to invite hostility. Do I not care about the woman who has been raped? Yes, I do. But I do not see why killing the second innocent party should make the mother feel better; what about the sense of loss and possible regret? There is more than one side here. But the vast majority of the abortions which take place have nothing to do with the extreme circumstances which the supporters of the abomination call in aid. How strange that in a society saturated with contraception, we should need so many abortions.

Before I married for the first time, I practised the best and most reliable method of contraception – I kept my panties on and my legs closed; it worked splendidly too! To my deep sorrow, it transpired that I have a gynecological problem which prevents me conceiving, which of course, I accept, may make my attitude to abortion particularly hostile. But there are many women like me who would love to adopt. More than 41 million babies perished in abortion this year alone. It is the only form of “healthcare” where one of those involved dies every time.

To justify this horror to ourselves, we subject the language itself to abuse. We do what the slave-owners did to justify their sin – we dehumanise the object of our sin and call the baby a “fetus”. I looked in the card-shop recently and you know what, I couldn’t find a single card saying “congratulations, you are having a fetus”; have you seen one? So, the greeting-card industry, which has a card for every season, has none for the “fetus”. What is the womb is a baby; what will be killed is a baby. But once admit that and the game is up. So let us pretend and insist on it.

But then, it is “my body, my choice”. Here, as a feminist, I take issue with another abuse of language. My body, last time I looked, had one head, two hands, and two feet. Before I knew I could not conceive, I thought I had a choice. I exercised it by keeping my clothes on and avoiding horizontal jogging with eager young men; it can be done you know! But, except in those hard cases of rape, we all have a choice. Those with no religious objections to contraception, who are willing to take the medical risks of the pill, can jog all they like and usually avoid contraception. Why not call it what it is? “I want the right to have sex on the same terms as a man, and to get rid of the consequence”? At least that would be honest; but once admit it and the thing is what it is – sheer selfishness and a desire to have what I want when I want it and for someone else to bear the consequences.

On this, the commemoration of the massacre of the Innocents, let us pray for all those souls killed before birth. Who can know what we have lost – another Shakespeare; the cure for cancer? But we do know what has been lost – a child who never had the chance to say that her choice mattered most.


[All of you know that I completely agree with what Jessica writes here, in fact, I asked her to write it, in recognition of the Feast of the Innocents. But for whatever reason, I forgot that the feast day was yesterday, and thought it today. Very stupid of me, and I hope you’ll forgive me. But, and this is important, this is something we should remember and pray about every day. I won’t say our actions redeem King Herod, nothing can, for two (let alone 41 million) wrongs do not make a right. But we, all of us, have no right any longer to look askance at him as we perpetrate horrors at least as bad as he did. He could at least claim he knew no better. What is our excuse? Neo]



I seem to be in a small minority among my friends in being delighted that Amy Coney Barrett has been confirmed as a Justice of the Supreme Court. That doesn’t surprise me. I’m a feminist in my thirties (okay, let’s be honest, pushing forty, but don’t tell anyone) and until I got with my partner I worked’ I worked in areas where the usual political views were of the leftist variety.  I think the example set by Justice Barrett is marvelous. I wish, when I was a little girl or an adolescent, there had been someone like her to whom I could look up.

Amy Coney Barrett did it without sacrificing her womanhood. She did not do what so many career women have had to do, which is to choose a predominantly male way (job first) over her kids. Not only did she adopt two black orphans, she has a Downes syndrome child whom she chose not to abort. What’s not to like? You’d have thought that feminists everywhere would be throwing their bras over the windmill (no, don’t go there, a lady never tells), so why the hoo-hah? It’s that last bit. She didn’t have an abortion. Not only that, she is an actual practising Catholic, not a Pelsoian/Biden Catholic (that is one who wants the vote but not the faith).

I am sickened by the reaction of some of my “sisters” to Judge Barratt. She’s the “wrong sort” of woman. Only women, and for that matter ethnic minorities, with the “right” (that is the “left”) view should be promoted. To me, that’s the epitome of intolerance. The showing the left is making at this time makes me fearful. Orwell’s 1984 was supposed to be a warning, not a blueprint.

I am not a lawyer. What I know of Judge Barrett is what I saw on the news – a poised, super-intelligent (and yes, beautiful) woman dealing with second and third-rate politicos the way a fly swatter deals with the fly. The spectacle of “lazy Masie” asking her about whether she’d ever sexually assaulted anyone was one of the most crass pieces of questioning ever seen; how can that Senator look anyone in the eye after that? But they could not lay a finger on her – or hold a candle to her. Amy Coney Barrett went through all that because she believes in her country and the rule of law.

I know that here I am preaching to the choir, but at home, well, I might as well get my handmaid’s dress and bonnet out – I am sure my other half will approve. In the meantime, God bless Justice Coney Barrett and God bless America!

Sunday Funnies; Free Like Flynn

Well, we have something other than Chines Bat Flu (although that’s still here) to talk about.


Why is my favorite convenience store hiding the Tobacco?

And, of course

Relationships: Who Needs a Partner?

Well, Audre really brought it yesterday, didn’t she? Like her, I think we’ve all written arguably too much about Chinese Bat Soup Flu, and yet there is little else going on. Next week is, of course, Holy Week, one of those times when we are more overtly Christian around here than usual. I suspect we’ll be even more than usual here, as well, simply because we are starting to see the suppression of Christianity in our societies, and that is not acceptable. So we’ll see.

Audre’s article reminded me of an article, considerably more lighthearted, that Jess wrote about John Ford’s reworking of The Taming of the Shrew, which she titled, appropriately A Spanking Good Time, and it is her most popular article ever here, and one of the site’s. If you haven’t read it, you should.

What are we going to do with these girls and their rambunctious posts? I vote we continue to enjoy them.

In any case, the two posts also reminded me of a post recently by John Hawkins. In it, he refers to a correspondent, who has stumbled into a relationship with a woman who wants a submissive lifestyle…

I (M20) am dating a woman (F20) who likes to be mistreated.

Okay. So this is going to sound bad but bare with me here. I’ve been dating this girl for 8 months. Been official 3 months. We care for eachother deeply and really enjoy each others company. From the outset she told me she was a people pleaser and naturally really submissive.

She wanted us to go into a BDSM style Sub and Dom relationship and though I had never been in one I figured it sounded fun and so why not?

She enjoys it when I am commanding and stuff but also enjoys being made to do things she doesn’t want to do. She has a bit of a force fantasy that she enjoys and I currently have her send me a nude every night before bed barring she is on her period when she will just show her breasts.

She is desperate to keep me happy and I sometimes force her to help me masturbate by sexting me even when she’s no in the mood. However when I talk to her about this she says she genuinely is really happy being made to do things. I’ll tell her off for failing to send me a nude every night. I’ll ignore her requests not to do things, if I apologise she says it’s okay she wants me to do as I please.

She sees herself as being put in her place below me and really loves it. It’s now at the stage she told me (because of one of my own sexual fantasies) if I wanted to get her pregnant I could and she’d obey.

The thing is… I just don’t see this as particularly healthy. It’s fun and sexy but the relationship on the whole is largely physical. I find myself being more controlling than I would normally be or would really want to be because I’m now filling a role. It’s wrong to do things when your partner says no but afterwards she will thank me.

I also find myself expecting more of her and demanding she do things I shouldn’t really but it’s part of the role.

I am worried I’m changing as a person and not for the better because of this dynamic.

I also don’t feel challenged or pushed to grow with this girl because… Well she worships me as I am and lets me do as I want.

What do I do??

John says, and I certainly agree, that he’s right to be concerned. Back when dirt was young, I tended to attract these ladies as well, probably because I don’t really back down, gracefully or otherwise. The funny thing was, this was during what we now call ‘second-wave feminism’ and without exception, these women in my life were medium or high powered executive types, who took no nonsense from anyone at work, but at home wanted to be totally dominated. Explanations? I have my suspicions, but I’m just guessing.

What I’m not guessing about is that John’s correspondent is correct. It will damage him, it did me, in all the ways, that John talks about. You know the other thing, after some period of time, for me it was about a month, it got boring. It’s hard to carry the whole relationship, especially if your working, and this is worse than most. Like most guys, I like and respect women, and value their thinking, not least because it’s nearly always different than mine. Well, guys, I’ll tell you, as attractive as it sounds to have some hawt cookie who’ll do anything you want, the one thing they won’t do, can’t do really, is be your friend, and I do not think there can be a proper relationship without a friendship underlying it. Your mileage may differ, but I bet it won’t.

Read what John has to say, as well.

Here’s what bothers me – relax, no mention of ‘you know what’.

A note: First the picture has bo relation whatsoever with the article, except that Raquel is not annoyingly skinny! Neither was Marilyn. If this article goes sideways on Audre (and I agree with her) leave me out of it. I’m not that big a fool. I will comment here though, that it is just as true for guys if you want to look good dress for your body, not some guy that just graduated from SEAL school or is specializing in soy-based food. Now, be kind to each other, and more or less behave! Neo

One of the best things – or maybe the only good thing – to come out of ‘diversity’ and ‘inclusivity’ is a growing acceptance of ourselves – how we look, what we wear, the way we present ourselves. Sigh … well, it started out good anyway.

Large women, who have always had trouble with self-image, are starting to find their beauty; that beauty that is unique to them. Every woman, in her own way, is beautiful. Each is one of a kind – unique. That is something to be celebrated and it’s taken women a long time to get here. But then they succumbed to very strident ‘sisters’ who said large women could be just like thin women and pushed to make large women wear the same kind of clothes thin women wear.

It certainly can be done. Clothing manufacturers have been shaken awake to the idea that most women are not size 0 and that large women have the same amount of dollar power as their skinny sisters. Wow. What a concept. That, too, has been a long time coming. It’s more than simply scaling up on the patterns, there are other considerations involved when designing for the fuller bust or the wider, deeper rear-end. It’s a whole new science for those manufacturers and they seem to be making a real effort to incorporate fit for the fuller figure to the most popular design trends.

And then … it went awry. It always does. Right now, the fashion is to wear clothing as close to the body as you can. It’s called ‘body con’ – body consciousness. It applauds showing every inch of the female frame while still being completely covered. If you’re size 0 (as most runway models are) or the more average size 8 or 10, a woman can look like a knockout! Every curve outlined, every bust or bottom highlighted. Those women can wear sleeveless tops, crop tops (those are tops that don’t come down to the waist) and ‘skinny jeans’ so tight you can take their pulse through the jeans just by looking.

But large women – I mean those that range from 22 – 30 – have started to wear the tights, too. I’m sorry. It’s not a good look. I understand the importance of loving who we are and how God made us. But what skinny-Minnie wears is not what the large woman should wear. I’m sorry. Big women should not wear tight clothes. It accentuates the lovely bustline on a thin woman and absolutely screams OMG! when a large woman wears a tight top. No one – no one – wants to see the exact outline of those huge, heavy pendulous growths! The most ardent breast man in the world looks askance at them! Not a good look. And for those who are daring and like to go braless, well if there’s a chill in the air or the air conditioner, what’s referred to as ‘headlights’ on a thin woman are KLEIG lights on a large woman and people – not just men – people stare at them not because they’re sexy but because of the size of them!

Ok – I have never figured out the reasoning but men like to look at ladies’ behinds. I can’t imagine why but then I have xx chromosomes. If your a thin woman and you have a tight butt, tight jeans and slacks look great. If you’re a larger woman and your butt jiggles and sways and bounces, ‘skinny jeans’ are not the thing for you. They show every bump and indent under a canvas that is too hard to miss. Love your behind if you must but please, spare the rest of us having to look at that. I’m not being unkind or uncharitable – I care how people perceive the larger woman and I know the cruel and unkind things that people say when they see a large woman showing her butt.

I’ve had my size 24 days and I’ve had my size 8 days and have lived in the world of skinny and have lived in the world of fat. Large women can dress so that they look drop dead gorgeous but it takes a little discretion on the part of the woman. Flowing blouses and tops that just sort of shape to the bust and flow away from the hip are so becoming! You can wear tight jeans if you wear a tunic top that just skims the butt and look smashing!

The Big and Beautiful Sisterhood just need to be a little real when they shop. A large woman’s arms may look just fine when her arms are at her sides but ladies, please, you know you’re gonna lift them arms!!!


Sunday Funnies; Winning

Kind of says it all.

Get your Democratic Socialism, right here


And, of course


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